How to sell with "un-actualised" regret

OK. Listen up.

Before you read this email, there’s a couple things ya need to know:

1) This is going to be a LONG boi (if you ain’t in the mood for a whirlwind dive into human psychology, you better bow out now)

2) The purpose of this email is to teach you how to THINK (I’m not just showing you WHAT to do, I’m showing you WHY it works in the first place)

3) I have BUNCH more emails I could pump out JUST like this one so….

If you read it, find it useful and want to see more “deep dive” style bonanzas (just like this) flying into your inbox, I need you to scurry on down to the bottom of this page, smash that “Reply” button and tell me ya liked it

(I don’t care what you say, just give me SOME indicator you found this useful)

Right. Preamble out the way.

Now to tell you what the fuck this email is ACTUALLY about.

Today I’m going to be introducing you to a concept I call “un-actualised regret”, and showing you how you can use it to make people buy your products and services.

What I want you to focus on is NOT the specific details, but the GENERAL PRINCIPLES — that way you aren’t limited to using this in emails (like I’m doing here), but you can apply it to sales calls, DM convos, sales pages, or however else you wanna peddle your stuff in the future.

And one more VERY important point —

As you read this email, I am going to be talking about “selling with fear” a lot.

I want you to remember that the goal is NOT to make your audience feel bad, or fearful about their future.

The goal is to make them fearful SO THAT you can show them how you EMPATHISE with their pains (which you have likely experienced yourself) and thus make them more receptive to you HELPING them.

This is a CRUCIAL, and KEY distinction. Don’t forget it.

Right. Class is in session.

One of the things I try to do with Top-of-Funnel social media content is push people towards the idea of building a personal brand.

Why?

Because the more people I can make AWARE of the benefits of building a personal brand, the more people I can (potentially) market my products and services to.

So, that’s what I’ll be “pretending” to sell today — the IDEA of a personal brand.

And that brings us onto the first stage of this process…

[Step 0] What are you pushing people towards?

In this example, I’m trying to persuade people to escape their 9-5, build a personal brand, and position myself as the person who can help them do this.

Right. That’s our “lens” focused.

Now we need to grab their attention.

[Step 1] Pains and problems

I would highlight the negatives of being trapped in a 9-5 (morning commute, being trapped in an office for 8+ hours every day etc).

I would then “pair” each of these problems with the associated emotion.

For example…

People don’t hate their morning commute. They hate the stress of being stuck on a packed-out, sweaty train. See the difference?

OK. Now we gotta help them understand WHY they feel this way…

[Step 2] Showing them WHY they feel this way

I would think about the things humans intrinsically want — a sense of purpose, perceived status etc.

I would then show them why the 9-5 life is inherently incapable of offering them these (so that they appreciate the underlying mechanism behind why they are feeling this way).

Sweet. Now we gotta make them feel like they have NO OTHER option.

Why? Two reasons. First, if you present a solution before someone feels a need for it, they don’t bite (people don’t buy pizzas when they aren’t hungry). Second, by delaying our “offer”, we minimise the time the person feels like they are being “sold” on something.

[Step 3] Nullifying alternative paths

I would put myself in their shoes, and try to think of all the alternative paths they could consider OTHER than my solution.

For example…

If they are trapped in a job they hate, they might believe moving jobs will fix their issue. I would then argue that, in most cases, when someone hates their job, it is often not the “job” that is the issue, but rather their personality type — they have an innate desire to do something “more” with their life. Moving jobs will not fix this. Alternative, nullified.

Maybe they could find a job which lets them work from home? That way they wouldn’t have to put up with the morning commutes. I would then show them that they would still be stuck doing work they don’t care about, and have a nagging voice in the back of their mind that they aren’t living up to their full potential. Alternative, nullified.

Once I have nullified all possible alternatives, they then see no way out.

This stimulates a feeling of hopelessness.

And when people feel hopeless, they are open to ANY solution which will eliminate their suffering.

Enter, my “offer”…

[Step 4] Your solution

I’m not going to hard-pitch personal branding. Instead, I’m simply going to show them how it fixes their current pains.

I would think about what these people HATE about their 9-5, what they would LOVE their day to look like, and show them how building an online business will give them this.

I would then contrast this “heaven scenario” with the “hell scenario” they are currently experiencing to stimulate their desire for change.

For example…

• These people HATE spending their whole day on boring tasks, which their boss has assigned to them

• They would LOVE to be able to work on whatever they want, whenever they want

The juxtaposition between the “hell scenario” they feel trapped in, and the “heaven scenario” I am offering further stimulates their desire for change.

Now they’re open to the idea.

But they still need clarity…

[Step 5] High-Level Path

I would list out the “big picture” steps they need to start their online busines.

For example…

• Learn to persuade (copywriting)

• [Optional] Learn another high-value skill

• Craft an offer

• Build an audience to push traffic towards this offer

Etcetera.

This gives them clarity, which, again, makes them more likely to act.

Note: I’m not showing them HOW to do this (that’s for my paid products and services). I’m simply showing them WHAT and WHY they would want to do this, so that they feel like they have a clear path out of their suffering.

[Step 6] Why might they doubt their ability to do this?

I would think about all the “limiting beliefs” they have, which might prevent them from believing they could make this work.

For example…

They aren’t a great writer. So what — anyone can learn to write.

I would back this up with the fact that I used to be a software developer (with zero writing experience), and not an expert writer.

I would make this feel easy, and like anyone (including them) can do it.

Note: The goal here is to make your audience feel like the same transformation is possible for them, by highlighting that you (or other people) have achieved the life they want while starting from the EXACT position they are currently in.

[Step 7] Plausibility

People are inherently sceptical. When your solution feels “too good to be true”, people don’t bite. So… you present some of the flaws in your solution, but make them feel 100x preferable to the alternatives. This makes your offer feel more plausible.

For example…

It takes time and effort to build your business. I wouldn’t hide this fact. Instead, I would spin it as a positive — it’s actually ENJOYABLE to do hard things, when you feel like they are contributing to your dream life. You only hate working hard at your job because it feels meaningless, and not aligned with your purpose.

Finally, we stimulate their “FOMO” response by showing them what will happen if they do NOT start building a business today…

[Step 8] Where will they be in 6-12 months if they DON’T act TODAY?

I would “project” them forwards in time and show them that, if they do NOT act, they would find themselves in the EXACT same situation they are in today, but even worse — they will have “lost” 6 months which could have been spent building their business.

I would make them feel like they have “missed out” on their potential to create a sense of FOMO, and use this to trigger their desire not just to act, but to act TODAY.

Not only that, but more people will have piled into the online business space by then. There will be more competition, and hence it will be harder for them to escape their 9-5 (which they now want to do) — better to start TODAY.

This triggers what I call “un-actualized regret”, which is another form of FOMO, and will make them want to act NOW.

Note: you could increase the strength of this appeal by making them feel “silly” or “ridiculous” for not acting. People hate feeling like the class clown more than anything else, after all. Bunch of angles here — I could show them how I felt like an idiot for not piling into online business earlier, reference past “boons” (e.g. Crypto) which they “missed the boat on” (and are now kicking themselves for), to further stimulate a sense of FOMO.

And, at this point:

• They have a desire to change

• They understand why they are experiencing pain

• They see a path away from pain, and towards pleasure

• They don’t see an alternative option

• They believe they are capable of making this transformation

• They feel the need to act TODAY

All I have to do is push them towards a relevant action — following me, subscribing to my newsletter, or buying my products and services, while showing them how this will take them one step closer to their goal (which I have just incepted in their mind).

Right.

That is MORE than enough words written for today.

Study the PRINCIPLES of selling above.

Put ‘em into practise.

And I have no doubt you’ll be making sales in no time.

Peace. I’m out.

Harry

PS. I fucking love deep dives into human psychology like this.

I’m honestly thinking about making it a centerpiece of my brand going forwards.

So, if you DID find this email insightful…

Reply “Psych” and I’ll churn out more like this in the future (takes you 2 seconds to reply, but MASSIVELY helps me know how I can help you best!).